“THE CEMETERY OF ISRAEL” BY OUR REGULAR COLUMNIST KHALID KISHTAINY

Israeli and Arab scholars have dwelt on the possibility of the Arabs in Israel exceeding the number of the Jews as a result of their consistently higher birth rate, a subject which is causing a great deal of concern among Zionists. It is for this reason some Arabs entertain the hope that the Palestinians may eventually become a majority and, in time, destroy the concept of the Jewish state by sheer weight of numbers.

In their vehement preoccupation with the subject of births, they forget the subject of deaths. According to the 2004 statistics, 6.18 persons out of every thousand people die every year in Israel. The burial of the dead is a government responsibility. Like Muslims, the Jews love their graves and refuse to accept any alternative to burial in proper tombs.

Like Muslims, they encounter formidable problems when the deceased has lost one of his legs or arms in all these wars that are taking place. On the day of resurrection, will the one legged dead wake up and find himself walking out of his grave to enter paradise hopping on one foot? Not a very pleasing sight for the angels or the prophets.

The Talmud does not mention whether there will be crutches in paradise. But even if supplies are plentiful, who wants to spend eternity on crutches, however good and divine they may be?

Interment requires at least four square metres per single dead, two for the dug up pit and two to separate one Jew from another, lest they should start quarrelling. The population of Israel is now almost seven million, which means that the authorities will have to find 28,000,000 square metres to bury all the existing citizens. As the total area of Israel amounts to some 200,256,250 or so square metres, and noting the rabbinical ruling that only one dead may be buried in a single grave, the whole land of Israel will be consumed by the dead Israelis in seven generations (or 7.15 generations to be exact).

There will be no land left to bury anybody. There will be certainly no space left for the living. Indeed all the magnificent towns, shopping malls, supermarkets, night clubs and nuclear centres will have to be pulled down to make room for grave- yards. Thus, the State of Israel will become the Cemetery of Israel. Zionist agents will do their best to urge Jews everywhere to visit Eretz Israel and see the endless rows of orderly Jewish graves, the final achievement of the Zionist movement.

I fail to understand all these top scholars who spend their time watching the birth rates of Palestinian and Jewish communities and overlook entirely the prospect of death. But this is what I say to the Palestinians. Don’t waste your time, your money and your lives on firing rockets and suicide missions. All you need do is to wait for seven generations when you will see the entire land of Israel turned into a great graveyard. Then, finally, Arabs and Jews will be left with nothing to fight about.

I was discussing this prospect with a friend of mine, a scholar and an expert on the Palestine question.

“Well that explains it,” he responded thoughtfully.

“Explains what?” I duly enquired.”The obsession of the Israelis to expand. People think they are trying to extend their borders in order to seize the oil resources of the Arabs. But clearly that is not the reason. They do it because they need Arab land for the burial of their dead.”

Khalid Kishtainy

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